As he entered the emigration tent on Long Wharf on the waterfront in Saint John, Canada, Freddie was in time to observe what must be the tail end of a particularly loud argument between Maria and Ralph Tinsley, two of the diners that he regularly served at the late seating in the main dining room of the Quincy Queen. There was a broad circle of empty space around the two. Other departing passengers were giving them a wide berth and turning their faces away from the battle as if nothing was happening.

She, elegantly thin, well-preserved late forties, and European in look, was standing stiffly, arms folded over her chest and looking into the distance along the long expanse of empty tent space off to the side of the long line of passengers moving toward the tour buses. In that corner of the tented area a young man was singing Sinatra songs with the use of a boom box and microphone. The husband, older than she was by a good ten years, and twice her bulk, with a bullet-shaped bald head and military bearing in spite of the shorts and T-shirt he was wearing, towered over the woman, fists clinched. The fireworks had stopped before Freddie entered the tent, but it was clear to the cruise line dining room waiter that this had been a rolling altercation—he’d heard some of it at dinner the previous night, as the ship cruised along from Bar Harbor, Maine, to Saint John, Canada. It was equally clear that the woman was beyond exasperation.

Freddie—that wasn’t his real name, but it was an approximation he had settled on because the passengers wouldn’t have been able to pronounce the name he’d been given at birth in Goa, India—had become very attentive to this couple. There obviously was a bubbling sexual tension between them that was something Freddie honed in on. He slowed down and turned off to the side, searching through his shoulder bag like he was looking for something, so that he’d have an opportunity to watch this little drama further. Several of those passing by him gave him a smile—more than one, like that French gay couple, gave him lingering looks of appreciation and interest. Freddie was striking, being a near identical twin of a young Denzel Washington, even down to the dark skin, thanks to his Goan ancestry. Freddie smiled back to each and every one, everyone being a future possibility, while keeping his eye on Maria and Ralph.

Freddie wondered how many of these passengers showing interest in him in his shorts and T-shirt recognized him as one of the dining room waiters rather than another paying passenger. To a great extent, his staff uniform was a barrier that helped him settle on possibilities. If someone—woman or man, it didn’t matter much which to Freddie—looked beyond his dining room uniform and still showed and signaled interest in him, it gave him some assurance and a play to start. Both Maria and Ralph, when they were jabbing and hissing at each other, had given him such looks during the last two dinner settings. Alphonse, the section head waiter, who did much of the identification and acquiring for him, for a cut of the profit, had already inclined his head toward the couple more than once during dinner service.

Tour tickets in hand, Ralph, with a motion for Maria to follow him, marched toward where tour guides were sorting out people to go on the various buses on separate tours. As soon as the man turned and stepped off, though, Maria, still clutching her sides with arms crossed across her chest and eyes downcast, started meandering, almost in circles, into the empty interior of the tent at the side of the line.

With wide gestures and intimidating on-the-edge speech, no doubt fed by the angry exchange just now with his wife, Ralph was engaging two of the tour guides. By the time he’d finished concentrating on them and looked around to realize that Maria wasn’t behind him, she had drifted to the far corner of the tent, behind the strolling minstrel crooner.

Ralph’s demeanor took on a panicked aspect, and he looked all up and down the line of passengers moving toward the bus and the footpath up into the city as if he was bereft to be left alone. He didn’t look as far away as the far corner of the tent, though, where Maria was moving through an opening in the canvas and toward the footpath.

Freddie realized this was an opportunity and one that came before he had anticipated it would. He would pick them off separately, which was better than tackling them together. But which one?

Ralph was moving up and down the line of passengers, obviously looking for his wife. Freddie could almost hear him growl and look back at the ship, take two steps in that direction, and then change his mind and move back in line toward the buses.

With a smile and an apology, Freddie cut through the line to the other side and, walking through the immense empty quadrant of the tent where the crooner was swaying and moving, passed through the opening at the far corner. Maria was well ahead of him, moving toward the path that followed around the ends of disused and deteriorating piers and then wound around the base of the Hilton Hotel and led up into the center of the old section of Saint John.

He followed her, through the crowds from the Quincy Queen and two larger cruise ships, up the hill and into town. She was shopping the windows of the commercial street, the stores not yet open, but, although she looked in the windows, she didn’t appear to be seeing anything. Freddie walked faster, but still unobtrusively, smiling at those he passed and getting appreciative “doesn’t he look just like . . .” smiles in return as he narrowed the distance between him and Maria.

She was standing in front of a jewelry store window, what claimed to be a Native American store, with a window full of sliver and turquoise and other polished stones jewelry. She was just standing there, teary eyed, tense still from frustration, and looking at the display of jewelry.

“I like that large slide there, the turquoise with the white veining in it,” he said in a low, mellow voice. His voice sounded like Denzel Washington’s too. “I think it would look great on you. Oh, and that tie tack is great too. I know just what I’d wear it with.” Actually, he knew just where he’d hock it and get over $100 for it.

“Eh, what?”

“That pendant right here,” Freddie said, leaning into her close and pointing.

“Yes, it’s pretty,” Maria said in an offhand manner, but as soon as the words were out she was brought up short, no doubt recognizing the timbre of his voice, but not necessarily knowing why or where from. She turned her face to the young man standing beside her and couldn’t help returning his engaging smile.

“Aren’t you?”

“Yes, ma’am, Freddie from the ship’s dining room. Sorry, I probably shouldn’t have—”

“No, no, Freddie. I’m happy to see a familiar face.”

“It’s a bit early for shopping in Saint John, ma’am. The old Victorian houses are a couple of streets higher, on Germain Street, if you’d like to see them first. Or there’s a coffee shop or two—”

“You’ve been here before, haven’t you . . . Freddie?”

“Yes, ma’am. This is my third circuit on this run this season.”

“I’d like a cup of coffee. If you could show me a good coffee shop nearby, I’d be happy to treat you to—”

“Oh, I’m sure you don’t want to . . . didn’t Mr. Tinsley come off the ship with you?”

“I have no idea where Colonel Tinsley is at the moment and don’t really care.” The “colonel” was pronounced with venom in her voice. But she regained control. “And I would really like a cup of coffee and have no idea where to get one.”

“Just down that street over there, you’ll find a good coffee shop. Not a chain, so it won’t be as crowded. Here, I’ll show you.”

Once in the coffee shop and sitting in a booth off to the corner and having coffee to sip, Freddie started in. “You seemed a bit sad back there at the jewelry store.”

“Did I? I guess this cruise isn’t doing what I had hoped. I had hoped it would clarify, but it’s just brought into focus something I didn’t want to see. Here, separated from West Point and all that entails, I thought I’d see so much more clearly. Unfortunately, I think I have.”

Her forearms were on the table in front of her, her fists clinched. Freddie reached over and gently unclinched them. She didn’t resist. “You are too tense,” he said, “Sometimes it helps to let some of it out. You are supposed to be on vacation, I believe.”

It wasn’t long before she was telling him of the sexual tension between her husband and herself because of his affairs—all short term—but all terribly frustrating and embarrassing for her. What Freddie focused on, though, was what she didn’t say but what he knew more because of what he’d been able to overhear while standing station in the dining room—when he, as a waiter, was just part of the wallpaper and unnoticed in the muttering, short jabs, the two had made to each other. What Freddie knew, which Maria wasn’t owning up to, was that the colonel’s affairs had been with men.

“I’m sorry,” she said after she’d wound down, “I didn’t mean to unload like that. I’m so embarrassed.”

“Don’t worry about it, beautiful lady. My lips are sealed.” Only as Freddie pulled a hand away to make a zipping gesture across his smiling, alluring face did Maria realize that they had been holding hands across the table and that all of the tension had flowed out of her. She didn’t take her other hand out of his.

“You are a beautiful woman,” Freddie whispered. “You deserve far better than that.”

She looked down sheepishly, and when he lowered his other hand to take hers, she gripped it like it was a lifesaver.

“Now, if you’d like to see the Victorian houses on Germain Street,” I’ll be happy to show them to you.

“Could we go back to that jewelry store first? I think I’d like to buy the silver and turquoise slide you pointed out. I think it was lovely and I can’t get it out of my mind.”

Freddie knew by now, though, that he was what she couldn’t get out of her mind. And of course she insisted on buying him the tie tack he’d pointed out as well.

He fucked her in a windowless niche notched into the side of one of the Victorian houses in an alleyway. They kissed passionately as he pressed her back into the brick of the niche. He unzipped her pants and pulled them and her panties down her thighs and entered her strongly with a long, thick cock as she hooked her legs on his hips and they continued in a deep kiss as he stroked up inside her.

They returned to the ship separately, but not without arranging an assignation for that night. Maria said she’d stay in town until just before sailing. That she couldn’t bear to see her husband again any sooner than she had to.

“He’ll go to the show and then to the casino after that,” Maria said. “I’ll have a headache. Our cabin number is 1548.”

* * * *

Freddie saw him almost immediately upon reboarding the Quincy Queen. Ralph Tinsley was walking all over the public areas of the ship, looking here and there. Freddie knew he was looking for his wife, Maria. Freddie also knew that Maria wasn’t planning to come back to the ship for at least three hours.

Picking a conspicuous place in one of the bars by the Centrum, the central atrium and public center of the ship, and turning himself so that those walking past him could get a good look at him, Freddie waited for Ralph to wear himself out. While he waited, Freddie got the come-on look from several other passengers in passing. He noted each one in his mind for possible opportunities later. For now, though, he had his sights set for Ralph. He didn’t go unnoticed. Ralph passed by more frequently and slowed down more each time he passed. Eventually he more or less collapsed in a seat at the same cocktail table Freddie sat by. He looked exhausted.

“Can I get you something to drink, Mister Tinsley?” Freddie asked in a soft voice, turning his smiling face and fluttering eyelashes toward the colonel, who he couldn’t call colonel yet because he’d only heard the title voiced by Maria.

“A vodka tonic would be nice,” Tinsley answered in a gruff voice.

Freddie hopped up and hurried over to the bar. When he returned, Tinsley was still watching him with surprised eyes. “It was a joke. I didn’t expect you to actually get me one. But I’ll be happy to drink it now that you’re here. Say, don’t I know you from somewhere?”

“I’m Freddie, your dining room assistant waiter. You look worried about something. Can I help you?”

“I can’t find the bitch.”

“The bitch?”

“Mrs. Tinsley. She’s gotten away from me. We had a spat and she’d mad enough to talk about something.”

“Talk about something? You’re worried about what’s behind the talk or you’re just worried about her talking about it?”

The colonel looked up at Freddie sharply. His look of surprise was replaced by one of speculation.

“You’re a very handsome man, Mr. Tinsley. I can only imagine what your wife might want to talk about that you’d rather she didn’t.”

“I doubt you can even begin to—”

“Oh, I think I can,” Freddie said, moving a hand to Tinsley’s knee. “The staff here is—I am—completely at your service. You asked for a drink and I got it. You can ask for whatever you want.”

“But you’re not in uniform. You’re not on duty.”

“Exactly. So, I can devote my time completely to your needs. Perhaps we can check your cabin.”

“I don’t think Maria’s in the cabin. She’s obviously hiding from me. The cabin would be the last place she’d go.”

“Which would be very convenient, don’t you think? For $100 I’ll be happy to check out your cabin with you.”

Colonel Tinsley nearly choked on his drink in sending it down the hatch as fast as he could.

Ralph sat on the end of the bed in his cabin, leveraging his strokes up with the heels of his feet and holding Freddie’s waist in his hands as, hands clasped around the colonel’s neck and leveraging off his own heels at the side of Tinsley’s hips, Freddie sat in the other man’s lap facing him and fucked himself on Ralph’s thick cock.

Before they were finished, Freddie had let go of his hand grasp, arched back toward the floor, and Tinsley had stood, crouched, with Freddie’s legs hooked on his hips, while the colonel slammed his cock hard into Freddie’s channel.

After a brief cooling off period, the colonel lay on his back on the bed and Freddie rode his cock, with his palms digging into the man’s muscular chest. When they were both spent, and while the colonel’s cock went flaccid inside Freddie’s channel, Freddie lowered his chest to Tinsley’s and they kissed.

“That’s nice,” Tinsley murmured. “Usually it’s just stroke off, pulling away, and walk off. There are West Pointers who want it but they don’t want to stay around to face up to what they are.”

“But they give you satisfaction that your wife doesn’t?” Freddie asked in a low voice.

“There was a time when I got plenty of satisfaction out of Maria. Don’t get me wrong about that. I’m bi, not completely gay. But it became humdrum with her. Not that the cadets are any more inventive. But they are hard-bodied and I get an extra thrill off doing them. Something new and different. But that’s wearing off a bit. That’s what Maria and I’ve been arguing about. I’ve been looking for something more special, more daring. She thinks what I’m doing is too dangerous—that I’ll be found out and she’ll lose out if it becomes public.”

Hard-bodied cadets, Freddie thought. As far as he was concerned, Maria was still pretty hard-bodied herself. He didn’t say that, of course. What he whispered was, “It should be safe here on the ship.”

“I don’t know what we could find here. You can’t just—”

“Shush,” Freddie whispered, placing his hand over Ralph’s mouth and reaching down to grip the man’s cock and balls with the other. At the same time he moved his channel around on Ralph’s cock and could feel it coming back to life. “For $500 I could arrange something for you. Maybe tomorrow. And I can get you a list of clubs you—and your wife—might like in New York.”

Ralph didn’t say anything at the moment—he was too busy breathing heavily and concentrating on what Freddie was doing with the hand wrapped around his cock and balls and with Freddie’s channel on Ralph’s cock. But afterward, Freddie laid back on the bed and smiled as he watched Ralph, looking pretty fit, if big, for his age, open the wall safe in the cabinet over the TV set and count out $600.

* * * *

Freddie was the model of decorum at dinner that night, being the perfect server. Both Ralph and Maria were quiet, each with his and her own little secret smile, each giving Freddie a furtive look when they didn’t think a spouse was looking. Freddie figured that Ralph hadn’t said anything about the deal that had been struck with Freddie for something special. Freddie hadn’t told Ralph what something special might be.

Maria stayed on, nursing her coffee, when Ralph said he was off to see the variety show and then to do some gambling in the casino later. There had been no sign of the two fighting. They must both be in some sort of truce, Freddie thought, no doubt forged by having had secret sex with the same man without knowing the other one had.

“Can you come to my cabin now?” Maria purred as they watched Ralph sailing off toward the entrance to the dining room.

“I have the dinner service to clean up,” Freddie whispered back, his eyes on those of Alphonse, the section chief waiter, who was watching him closely. “I’ll be there at 9:30.” He knew that all he need do was get through the service, that Alphonse would see to the cleanup of the table.

“I will be waiting for you at the door.”

“No, I can obtain a pass card. I want you waiting for me naked on the bed.”

Maria gave a little gasp and rose and left, trembling.

When Freddie entered the room, he flipped off the overhead lights, leaving only the spot lights over the curtains at the balcony on. Maria was lying on the bed, naked, her chest rising and falling in nervous anticipation. Her eyes went large as Freddie undressed at the foot of the bed, slowly taking off the pieces of his uniform, folding them, and laying then on the chair by the dresser. Her eyes went even larger when he flipped out four condom packets and a bottle of lubricant on the bed beside her.

When he was done preparing, he gently grasped her ankles and pulled her down the bed until her buttocks rested on the foot of the bed. Kneeling between and spreading her thighs, Freddie went down on his knees and went immediately between her folds with his mouth, searching for and finding her clit with his tongue and teeth.

Maria moaned and writhed, her claws clutching Freddie’s wavy black hair, and cried out and ground her pelvis into Freddie’s face through her first orgasm. He stood up between her legs, and Maria reached out for him with her arms.

“Please, now. You. Inside me.”

Freddie laughed, but she gasped in surprise as he reached down and turned her over to where she was bent over the bed on her chest. He lubricated both of his hands, palmed her V through her legs with one hand, and entered her with two lubricated fingers and slowly stroked her.

“Oh fuck, yes,” she murmured and then it was, “Oh god, oh shit!” as his mouth went to her asshole.

After a few minutes lubricated fingers went there as well. Maria was getting the idea now, and she began to squirm and beg—it being unclear what she was begging for—and then to groan and cry out as, sheathed, Freddie worked his cock into her ass channel and began to slowly pump her there while the fingers of his other hand stroked her in the other channel. After a few minutes, when he was comfortably saddled and she had stopped struggling, Freddie pulled his fingers out of her muff, grabbed both of her legs, and spread them wider. His cock sank into her ass deeper, and she cried out again, clutched at the bedspread with her fists, and made little huffing noises.

By reading this story you agree that you are at or above legal age in your location.

Certain sexual activities that may be depicted in this story are safe only in fictional literature .

This is the story is a work of total fiction. Any resemblance to real people, dead or alive, is purely coincidental.

All feedback is appreciated.


My name is John Tinker and I’m now 33 years old. There were times when I was sure I’d never live to see twenty years of age, and there was a time when I was only 17 that I was ready to end my life of misery and pain. When I became 18 years of age I found the opportunity to make something of myself and changed my life from one of despair to one of hope and most of all, to one that is overflowing with love. This is my story.

My parents were killed in an auto accident when I was seven years old. My only other living relative is my Aunt who is raising four children on her own and could not take me in. I wound up in the County Foster Care program and by the time I was ten I had been in seven different foster homes. A couple of them were really nice, with Foster Parents who were kind and really cared for me and about me, but in both cases their jobs took them out of state and I was shuffled along to the next Foster Home. I was taken away from three of them because I suffered from malnutrition. The Foster parents are paid by the county to feed and provide for the children in their care. With the exception of the two families who moved out of state, the care of the Foster Child was last on their list of things to do with the money from the county.

By age fourteen I had grown enough to fight back when I was being mistreated and this only got me detention time in Juvenile Hall. I learned to prefer Juvenile Hall over a Foster home, there was plenty of food and less physical abuse. No one was allowed to beat me and I learned to live with the little things that were demanded of me to keep me safe and secure. I much prefered life in Juvie than the crapshoot that was a Foster Family. I cannot detail the abuse I suffered while in the Foster Care program because this site would not publish this story if I did.

I was released as an adult at when I turned 18, alone and with no home nor anyone to go to. I had $5.00 in cash given to me to ‘live on’ while I searched for a job. I would stand for hours at intersections to beg for work, money, or food. Young guys like me didn’t do as well begging as the older guys, I hadn’t figured out the right lies to tell the mark with the cash as yet and it just seemed wrong for a young and healthy man to stand there begging. I knew that I could easily make my way stealing and robbing but I wanted desperately to be a better man. A productive citizen and to be accepted into everyday society as one of the working middle class. Not as the unwanted castoff I have been so far in my miserable life.

I knew that to break the trend to turn to booze and drugs. I had to keep myself off of drugs and steer clear of those who would involve me in the easy, illegal side of life. I began going to the day laborer pick up spot and had much better luck there. Being young and fairly strong I was usually in the first group chosen. At the end of the day I could look at myself, even if it was only a reflection in a storefront window, the day will come when I have my own mirror. When ever I could, I stayed in a homeless shelter, where I could bathe and be clean for the next job. By careful spending and not wasting cash on beer and cigarettes I managed to save a small nest egg for those rainy days when there was no work. I knew I had to eat and keep up my appearance so that I would continue to be chosen for work.

One summer morning I was chosen for work by a guy who was remodeling his home and backyard, currently installing a huge new deck. The house was a Craftsman bungalow built in the late 40′s, a bit run down from neglect, but it had great bones and was solidly built. It was easy to look at the house and see what it could be, when restored to it’s former glory. It did have a working swimming pool out back that tempted me every day. It was easy to spot the where the owner had been working, and I could tell that his place would really be nice when he has finished.

I had figured out early on in this day labor work that being polite, coming to work clean and scrubbed and keeping myself busy with the job at hand would keep me working. This man that we were working for liked me and the other two guys he had hired and after three days, he told us meet him at a different place and he would put us to work until his job was finished, The other guys were Roger and Jerry and I’m John but everyone calls me Jack.

The man we were working for, Drew Duncan, was young, I was fairly sure he wasn’t thirty as yet. He had bought this older, run down house in a run down neighborhood that that several younger people had discovered and were restoring homes here and reinvigorating the whole neighborhood. I learned that Mr. Duncan was an Engineer with a large local firm. My co-workers Roger and Jerry were close friends and kept to themselves when we were on breaks or at lunch. Mr. Duncan always had something for our lunch and sometimes sat and chatted with me as we ate since Rog and Jerry were off to themselves.

When he found out that I was homeless Mr. Duncan insisted that I stay in the garage apartmentment at his place. The Apartment was just as run down as the rest of the place but Mr. Duncan spent the afternoon in there while the three of us worked on the deck. When the days work was over and Rog and Jerry were leaving Mr. Duncan called me over and took me up to the apartment. He had put a window fan in the bedroom window, swept and dusted and made up a single bed. He told me that there were no facilities operable yet and that I could use the restroom and bath in the house until he had the apartment’s utilities and turned on. I was stunned that he would make such an offer to someone like me that he didn’t know.

After my second night there Mr. Duncan told me that I now had electricity in the apartment and that the plumber would be here tomorrow to get the bathroom operating; I was on cloud nine. That night I was up until midnight straightening up, cleaning and making the kitchen and living area presentable. There were a small table and two chairs, a tiny apartment sized gas stove and a small upright refrigerator and sink in the kitchen, two cupboards held a few odd and mismatched plates, cups and glasses. A sofa in the living area, one end table with a lamp and a twin bed with nightstand and lamp and a chest of drawers in the small bedroom.

I had found some paint in the garage and Mr. Duncan said I was welcome to use it. When I ran out of paint after I had done the bath and kitchen, he bought more and I finished painting in the living room. Now that I was staying at Mr. Duncans I was able to buy food at the grocery and put in in the fridge. He had been feeding me dinner as well as lunch. I told him that I could feed myself now and I really appreciated all he had done for me.

I had expected that he would deduct a part of my wages for use of the apartment but after two weeks had passed I went to his back door one night and knocked. He opened the door and asked me in and I handed him fifty dollars telling him it was for the apartment. He sat at the kitchen table and motioned for me to sit too. He offered a beer but I told him no, I didn’t want to get to liking the taste until I could better afford it. I would stick to water and soft drinks for now. He looked at the money and told me that it wasn’t necessary, the place was there and he was glad I was using it.

“Mr. Duncan, I have to pay you or I can’t stay here. You’re paying for this place, there’s water and electricity that are extra because I’m using them. I have to pay my way sir.”

“Jack can we strike a deal here? First off please call me Drew, Mr. Duncan is my Dad. Secondly, that place over the garage isn’t worth fifty dollars a month. But while you’re working here you can pay me $35 a month and that includes the water and electricity. No arguments!

I like having you here. You are the best worker I’ve ever hired and you seem to care about this place like I do. I would be glad to have you eat with me every night, I really do not like eating alone but I won’t impose on your free time. Also, if there is anything in that old garage you want or can use in your place upstairs feel free to take it. It will end up being put in the trash unless you use it. One of these days we’re going to tackle that Garage and get it so that I can put my truck in there. I will give you food when I have some left over, I just can’t throw it away. Are we okay here, do you agree to what I’ve proposed Jack.?”

I know I blushed, Mr. Duncan…I mean Drew, was looking at me so intently I couldn’t have said no to him if I had wanted too.

“Yes sir, I agree but you are far too generous with someone you don’t know.”

“Jack I’m a fairly good judge of people. You’re a good young man, I can sense that about you. I don’t know anything about you or your the life you have lived. I can see in your eyes that you have known pain and probably hard times as well. I can also see that you’re good young man who just needs a break or two to come his way. That old garage apartment out there is a break for you Jack. The very fact that I found you at the day labor work pool seeking an honest days pay speaks volumes about your character. I trust you John Tinker.

Oh, I have a couple of things for you to take to your place if you want them. Here’s a radio and a portable TV, I’ll have a satellite connection run up when they install it at the main house next week.”

I know my mouth dropped open I had never been allowed to watch TV with the foster families. This was a real treat.

“Jeez, really…Thank you Mr. uh, Drew; gee, I’ve never had a TV or a radio to use as my own. You’re a swell guy Drew, thanks again.”

“Hey Jack, one more thing I forgot…feel free to use the pool when you want.”

“Really! that’s so cool, thanks Mr…er Drew.”

After we had finished with the deck, Roger and Jerry went on their way and I stayed on and helped Drew with work inside his house. When he took time off from working on the house I went to the day labor pick up site and was usually picked every day I was there. Drew would tell me when he was ready to start on the house again and I would be there to work for him.

One night after I had been there over three months I was sitting by the pool, just enjoying the night and thinking about how lucky I am now. I realized that for the first time since I was seven years old there was someone in my life that I could trust. If I needed help I knew Drew would be there. That thought made me choke up, I felt tears brimming in my eyes. For the first time in my life, I have a friend.

One night I decided to take a quick swim before bed. All the yard lights were off with the light in the pool being all that was on. I never saw Drew in the shadows on the deck. I had an old pair of cut off jeans that I wore in the pool since I didn’t own a bathing suit but with it dark out I stood at the edge near the deep end and let my cut offs drop and I dove in naked. When I surfaced at the other end of the pool and stood up in the shallow water, all the lights in the yard were on. I turned and Drew was stepping off the deck laughing. He walked to the deep end and bent to pick up my cutoffs. Still laughing he said.

“Gee Jack look what I found, wonder where these came from. I’ll put them on a chair on the deck so they won’t get wet. Don’t worry, Jack, I’ll turn off the lights, but you are going to have to get your shorts off the deck.”

“Aww Drew, don’t be so cold man, why don’t you come in too. Drop trou and hop in man. C’mon, I’ve never seen you use this wonderful pool. Hop in Drew. I promise I won’t look at your naked, skinny little butt.”

He started toward me then stopped, stepped out of his jeans and jumped in. By the time he came to the surface I was out and carrying his jeans to the deck. I decided to run and jump in the water, I didn’t feel right just walking toward him naked. But once in the water we swam some laps and settled into the shallow end our elbows and upper arms on the pool deck holding us up. We were near a corner in the shallow end with him on the back wall toward the house and me on the side about 10 feet away. I could see that he had an erection and it wasn’t long before I had one as well.

I was embarrassed that the sight of Drew standing naked in the water made my cock hard. I knew I shouldn’t ever think of this good man and my friend that way. He saw me blushing.

“Jack it’s okay, a naked man in water usually results in an erection. I have one too. It isn’t a big deal, at least mine isn’t.”

We both were laughing at that. He turned and pushed off with his feet against the wall floating on his back, his erection had subsided and I watched him float away.

“Come with me Jack, float away with me.”

Soon we were side by side, a foot or so apart.

“Thanks Jack, I needed this. It is really nice in the water tonight. It’s good to be here with someone too. Some days I get really lonely.”

“Man I know all about that” I said. I know I just work for you Drew, but you’ve been a true and good friend to me. You are the only person I have ever been able to call my friend. I don’t want you to be sad or lonely. There’s not much I can do about either but if I could, I would.”

“I appreciate that, Jack. Have you never had a friend before?”

“No sir, but that part of my life is over and done. Thanks to Mr. Drew Duncan I have a totally new outlook on life and a chance to make something good of myself.”

Laughing, Drew accidently swallowed water the wrong way and was coughing and sputtering. I quickly turned and held him up while taking us to the side of the pool, for just a brief moment our bodies touched from chest to thighs as we went to the side of the pool. I sprung a woodie like never before. I kept myself facing the wall and slightly turned so drew wouldn’t see the effect our contact had on me. I was blushing again. When Drew’s coughing had stopped he lay his head on his folded arms on the pool deck facing me. He smiled at me.

“Thanks again Jack. You saved my life.” He joked.

I looked straight into his eyes and told him.

“It’s just the opposite Drew. You have saved my life. It wasn’t so very long ago that I was thinking of ending my life, then you rode into my life in that white pick up and saved me. There’s no way I can repay your caring and kindness. You’re a very special person Drew Duncan, I’m so very lucky to have met you.”

I saw his eyes glisten with brimming tears then he turned to face away from me. We were silent for awhile I thought once I would say something but I didn’t, we just stayed quiet. In a few moments he straightened and pulled himself out of the pool onto the decking. He held out a hand and I took it and he hauled me out as well. We walked naked, side by side to the deck where he picked up my cut offs and tossed them to me.

“Someday Jack, when you are ready to talk about it I would like to know about you, your life. I don’t want to pry or intrude, if the time should ever come that you want to tell me, I’ll listen. Nothing can change what has happened, but we, you and I, can make the future be what you want it to be. I’ll do my best to see that you are never hurt again Jack. Thanks, the pool was fun. We ought to do this more often. I need a friend too.”

Jack walked into his home and I went up to my apartment, as I walked in the door, the yard lights went out. I was truly moved by Drew wanting to know about my life. And I wanted to hug him to me when he said he needed a friend too. I know that he is the first person to truly care about me since my parents and I also knew that I wanted to hold him, to kiss him, to love him. I knew that could never be, no one will ever love me, too much has happened to make me the undesirable person that I am.

The summer waned and turned to fall and Jack had to put the renovation on hold for a few weeks because of his job, He had to travel and be away from home for two weeks and he asked me to stay in his house instead of the apartment. Just to be sure no one broke in, the neighborhood was on the way back but there were still rough elements to be wary of here. I was happy to be able to do something for this wonderful person who had appeared in my life.

The first night I slept in his bed I could smell his scent in the pillows and sheets. My cock got rock hard at the smell of him. I found a pair of his shorts in the laundry hamper and slept with them in his bed. And yes, I admit that lying in his bed, his undershorts pressed to my nose I masturbated and brought myself to a shuddering climax. From that night on, it was Drew I thought of when I relieved myself with masturbatuion. I knew it was hopeless and futile, even though I had never seen him have a girl or even a guy as company.

I took two days off from the day laborer work and worked in Drew’s garage. He had said when I first came here that one day we would get it to the point he could park his truck there at night. I salvaged everything I could that I could use upstairs, there were old pictures, an old trunk that I used as a coffee table, more dishes, pots and pans and a box of bedding . I stopped at a WalMart on my bus ride home one night and got curtains for the bedroom and living room and throw rugs and a bath mat for the shower. I was amazed at how well this ramshackled little place came together. I was proud of my home. My first home. I felt so good, I was proud of what I had done in the apartment and proud that I could surprise Drew with the garage. I repaired and replaced worn parts for the overhead door tract and gave the door the once over and had it operating smoothly for the first time in years.

The day I knew Drew would be returning home I got in around 6:30pm, I saw that Drew’s truck and another car were in the drive. I walked back to the garage, disappointed that I wouldn’t get to talk with him right away. I had missed him more than I could have ever imagined possible. I fixed a sandwich and had turned on my little TV. When I heard a splash in the pool, I looked out the window and saw Drew and another man in the pool laughing and splashing each other, having fun. I was jealous, he’d brought a friend home instead of wanting to be with me after his trip. I was crushed.

I went to my bed and lay there feeling sorry for myself, knowing that no one as good as Drew would ever consider the likes of me for a true friend. I lay there sad, hurt and feeling sorry for myself and dozed off to sleep. I awoke sometime later to a loud knocking at my door. I stumbled to the door and saw Drew standing there.

“Hey Jack, It’s good to see you and good to be back home, I didn’t see you come in. I would like you to come down in a bit, there’s someone here I want you to meet. Come when your ready, we’ll be in the house. Hey…are you okay buddy?”

“Yeah, I just fell asleep. Still groggy. I’ll come down in a bit, need to wash my face for sure.”

“It sure is good to see you Jack, I missed you these past couple of weeks.”

I smiled half heartedly, and thought yeah, you missed me so much you brought another guy home. And he is staying in the house with you.

“Sure, I’m glad you’re back home too.”

I took a few minutes more and had renewed little pity party, feeling sad and then I changed my clothes and went down to meet Jack’s friend. My heart was hurting with every step I took toward his back door. I already felt like this guy had replaced me as Drew’s friend. Crazy thoughts I know, but back then with Drew my only friend, my first friend, I was insanely jealous that someone else was here. I rapped gently on the door and the new ‘friend’ opened it smiling broadly.

“Come in, you must be Jack, I’m Don, I’ve heard a lot about you from Drew.”

I shook his hand and entered just as Drew came into the kitchen from his room. Drew walked up to me and put an arm over my shoulders. I felt him pull me too him a bit in a sort of hug and my heart raced. It was the first time we had touched since that night in the pool. I was grinning like a Cheshire Cat I know, I couldn’t help it. I was completely bonkers for Drew, I knew it was a hopeless cause but I couldn’t stop it. He was my friend and benefactor, a handsome man and the most kind and generous person I have ever known.

“Here you are! Jack, I want you to meet Don Duncan, my little brother.”

I looked up at Don who stood six inches or more above both Drew and I.

“Little brother?”

Laughing Drew said, “guess I should say younger instead of little brother. Anyway, he’s come to visit for a few days and see what we’ve done to the house. Don saw it when I made the offer on it and hasn’t seen all of our hard work..

I was feeling better by the minute. Drew was saying we, and our as he talked about the reno work. And best of all the new guy was his brother! I could see the resemblance in their faces now. The difference in their height was a shock at first, but now I could see that they were brothers. The front doorbell rang and Drew answered and came back to the kitchen with two large pizza’s.

“Jack, sit. You’re eating with us. No argument, okay.”

“Yes Mr. Duncan.” I answered and we all laughed.

As we ate Don and Drew told me childhood tales and pranks they had shared and pulled on one another. We all laughed until our faces hurt. At one point I felt Drew’s leg against mine, I didn’t know when it had happened, suddenly I just felt him against me. During one of Don’s tales, Drew reached over and put his hand on my shoulder, squeezed it gently and then let go. I looked at him and he winked at me. I didn’t know what to think or say, I just smiled back and turned to look at Don as he finished his story.

Suddenly I remembered my own news. I hoped that Drew would be excited about it even if it did mean I would be away from home at night for a while. When there was a lull I told him that I had a few things to tell him about. One was a really big deal and that I hoped he would be as excited about it as I am.

“First, you guys come with me up to the apartment. Did Don ever see it before?

We were going up the stairs when Don laughed.

“Apartment! I thought it was a storage attic, full of junk and filthy to boot.”

“Easy man, that’s my home you’re trashing there.”

I opened the door to them and said.

“Welcome to my place guys.”

Drew was speechless for a few minutes, he looked into the bedroom, the bath and finally sat down on the sofa.

“I can’t believe this. This place really looks nice Jack. You’ve worked a miracle here.”

“Well all but the curtains and the rugs are yours, they were in the garage downstairs.”

“But this was all junk down in the garage, you’ve turned junk into accessories and decor. there may be a decorator hiding inside you Jack.”

“I can hardly believe this is the same apartment I saw when you bought the place Drew. This is amazing.” Don added.

“Lets go back down, three up here is a crowd.” Drew said laughing.

As we turned the corner of the garage I told Drew I needed something from the garage. He reached and tugged hard on the handle and jumped back when the door flew up so fast. Looking inside Drew was stunned, the entire floor area was clear, the walls were painted white, and there was a work table at the far end of the garage with assorted garden tools hanging on the walls each with a taped outline so anyone would know where to store the tool. Drew just hugged me to him.

“Thank you Jack. This is perfect. You sure have surprised me this time.” Drew said.

“This really is a big deal Jack, you’re a hard working guy with Initiative. You will go far my friend.”

“I hope so, but this isn’t the big deal I was talking about. Lets go sit on the deck while I tell you what I’m going to be doing starting next week.”

Drew got us tall glasses of tea and we all sat at the deck table.

“While you were away I managed to work eight days, don’t want you thinking I lazed around in the pool while you were away. But I hope you don’t mind Drew but I’m going to be away most nights for a while. It will be at least 10 pm when I get home. Drew, I’ve enrolled at the Community College in night classes. I’ll be studying courses in Construction Management. I enjoy working with my hands and it’s is something I know and understand. I start on Monday night.”

Drew jumped from his chair and pulled me into a big bear hug.

“ALL RIGHT! THAT’S AWESOME JACK. WAY TO GO MAN, I’M SO PROUD OF YOU. One thing that I insist on though Jack, don’t apply for any of those student loans they pitch at you. Any money you need I’d gladly give you but I know you wouldn’t accept that. I will loan you anything you need with the most reasonable rates in town. Promise me Jack, that you will not get hooked into those student loan programs. I mean it. Promise, now.”

I was blushing again. This man’s generosity amazes me sometimes.

“Yes Mr. Duncan, I promise I won’t borrow from anyone but you.”

Drew hugged me again, and whispered in my ear.

“I’m so very proud of you. You are a fantastic young man. You’re staying here right, you’re not gonna leave this place we’re building are you.”

“No sir, you’ll have to run me off, I’ll stay here as long as you will let me. You’re my first and only friend. I can’t leave you.”

“Jack, that’s the best news I’ve heard in a very long time. I’m so proud of you and happy for you too. Anything I can do just let me know. Drew told me he knew you were a go getter that first day he worked with you. He’s told me a lot about you since you’ve been here. Jack this is super news. We need to celebrate. Tomorrow is Saturday so the three of us are going out to a fancy restaurant for a celebration dinner and a going away dinner for me. I’ll be going back home Sunday.” Don added, When Don excused himself to the bathroom I looked to Drew.

“Drew I don’t have the right clothes to go to a fancy restaurant; will you guys take me shopping? I’ve never had anything other than work clothes.”

“Come with me Jack. I”m taking you shopping right now.”

I followed Drew to his room and he opened his closet. I had never seen so much clothing in one place before. We were only an inch different in our height and a couple of pounds in our weight. I blushed crimson having to stand there in my tighty whities while he kept laying out slacks for me to try on. Drew yelled out to Don that we were in his room when Don came out of the bath.

“Whoa, man What are you doing to this poor guy Drew, you’ve already got him out of his pants, you sure you want me to see this?

“Just looking for something Jack can wear out tomorrow night when we go to eat” Drew said.

“Tell you what Drew, let me do this and you go fix a couple of drinks, Jack and I will pick out something and then tomorrow night he can surprise you with the outfit he’s chosen You know I’m better at this that you are. We’ve had this discussion many times.”

“Okay, but Jack, you yell out if he gets too bossy for you.” Drew said over his shoulder as he went to the kitchen.

Don turned to me.

“What do you like Jack. How do you want to look. You hair is a bit long, but I can I trim it up a bit tomorrow. Look, there in the corner, see those Men’s magazines, thumb through some of them looking at how the guys are dressed and just tell me when you see any you like. I mean a look that you would like to wear. You’re nearly identical to Drew in size so chances are we can come very close to what you see there. Drew has way too many dress clothes anyway.”

I was flipping through the pages and suddenly stopped and pointed.

“Don, this is kinda cool I think, can you make me look like that?.

“Well, well well. Who knew you had such an eye for style. Jack that look is perfect for you with your dark hair and dark complexion. Now lets find that or something very near it in his closet.”

It took us half an hour before Don zipped everything into a travel suit bag for me to take back to my place. He even had a pair of Drew’s shoes and socks and a belt thrown in the bag. We went back out on the deck and chatted for an hour or so more when Don begged off and went to bed.

“Jack I am truly proud of you, you’re going to be a success in whatever you choose to do. I hope I can be there cheering you on every step of the way. Oh, big Don thinks your a great guy too.”

“He’s really neat too, Drew, but where did he get those tall genes? He is one big man!”

“Our Grandad was 6’6″ so that’s where it came from. How did everything go while I was away Jack, any problems?”

“No problems other than me just being lonely here by myself at night, I went over to the Day Labor spot and picked up eight days work while you were away. I slept in your bed, I hope you don’t mind, I could smell you there and I wasn’t so lonely. I washed all the sheets and coverlets and put them on this morning, it’s clean and fresh for you.”

Drew had a strange look I hadn’t seen before.

“Oh gosh, I’m sorry, Drew, I shouldn’t have done that, slept there I mean. Please don’t be mad. I should have known better, I’m really sorry, but it’s clean now I promise.”

“Jack! I’m not mad, I’m kind of flattered that you slept there to smell my scent. That you missed me not being here. You’re a good friend Jack, I missed being with you too. I wanted to call you but knew you don’t have a cell phone, we may have to get you one tomorrow. I know…yes you’ll pay for it, we can get a good prepaid plan, sixty minutes air time and a phone for about $50. That is if you want one.”

“Drew you the only person I would ever call. It’s a waste of money as far as I’m concerned.”

“You’re the boss Jack!”

We sat quietly across from each other at the deck table, each looking at the other, quiet not saying anything. Finally I spoke up.

“What are you looking at Drew, you have this weird look, well not weird but odd,.I haven’t seen it before. Is something wrong?”

“No, I was just thinking back to when we first met, and how you have continually surprised and delighted me with your willingness to work and how much I have come to depend on your help as well as your companionship. Little did I know when you came to work that first day that I would come to treasure your friendship and love and respect the man that you are. You are truly a good guy John Tinker.”

I felt my face flush and he smiled and said.

“Now you’re just being cute, adorable even.”

Drew shook himself like he had been asleep. He stood, I followed and he turned and said that he was going off to bed. He stepped to me and put his arm around my shoulder again and squeezed like before. This time I turned to face him and hugged him back with full body contact. Drew looked surprised.

“Sometimes I just need to hug you to me Drew. You’re my Guardian Angel, you saved me and gave me hope and a purpose to live. Your the first person I’ve ever loved. I want you to be proud of me, like I am proud of knowing you and being your friend. You’re the first person who has ever hugged me. You’re the first person in so many things in my life. I love you for that and I thank you Drew.”

Drew hugged me to him again then kissed my forehead.

“You’re such a good young man. We need to say good night now, before you make me cry. Sleep well Jack, I’ll see you in the morning.”

“Yeah G’nite Drew, sweet dreams.”

Saturday morning I woke to laughing and splashing going on in the pool. I went to the window and watched as Drew and Don played around, diving under and pulling each others trunks down, dunking the others head under water. I smiled and just stood watched them. Drew spotted me at the window and both of them began yelling for me to come on down and join in. I grabbed my cut offs from the railing by the door and rushed down and cannon balled both of them.

The three of us rough housed and played for more than a hour, I was glad for the cut offs because all the body contact with Drew had me erect and aching for most of the time. Around noon we all got out of the pool and lay out on the lounge chairs soaking up the sun and drying off. My thoughts were about Drew as usual, wondering how he had come to this place, what had happened in his life, his past. I never talked about my past, I couldn’t risk it, fearing he would be repulsed by the life I had led. .

Drew is an amazing cook as well as an amazing man, friend and even landlord. He came out onto the deck with tall glasses of tea and three beautiful Taco Salads in Tortilla Shell bowls. We talked and laughed a lot. Don and I cleaned up the kitchen and he got Drew’s barber scissors and took me out to the deck to trim up my longish hair. When he was done he took me into the bath and showed me how to shave and leave the stubble beard that looks so sexy on some guys. Drew came back and announced that we had 8:30 pm reservations at Bones, a very chic steak restaurant. Don quickly asked if a tie was required and was told no that it wasn’t. Don wanted to go do some shopping and we all piled into his car and went to the mall.

I quickly learned that the shopping trip was more for me than for Don. He asked when my birthday was and I told him that it was still two months away. He asked the date and when I responded he looked to Drew.

“Did you get that Lil bro?”

Drew just nodded while Don kept pulling out clothes and holding them up in front of me. When I asked him why, he told me that he would be getting married in a few months and I would need a suit for his wedding.

“You and Drew will be there, Jack, no arguments!”

I looked over to Drew and said.

“Damn, he’s bossy, just like his brother, isn’t he.”

Don had me trying on suits until finally he said “Aha! This is it. He took it to the clerk paid and handed me the bag.

“Happy Birthday Jack.”

I started in on how I paid my own when he held up his hand to stop me.

“Learn how to accept a gift graciously, Jack. People who care about each other often give gifts, It’s a gesture of their esteem and regard for you. You’ll get your chance to return the favor when I get married.”

“Thank you Don, forgive me please. Drew and now you have overwhelmed me with your kindness and generosity. It is something that I never have known previously. I don’t mean to appear ungrateful at all, I truly treasure you guys and all you do and have done for me. I’m just not accustomed to anyone treating me so nicely. Thank you both.” We all had a quick swim when we got back and Drew and Don both took a nap in the shade on deck lounge chairs. I went up to my place and started getting ready for tonight. I polished the shoes I would wear and I tried on the outfit Don picked out from Drew’s closet again. With my hair neatly trimmed I was surprised and even pleased with the way I looked. No one would ever guess that I was penniless and homeless only a few weeks ago.

I was dressed and ready to go at 7:30 pm. I paced the floor and went to look in the mirror again, I checked my teeth at least ten times I know. I heard Drew and Don laughing on the deck and looked out and saw that they were dressed and ready. I took a deep breath and slipped on the jacket, ran my fingers through my hair and started down to meet them. Drew had his back to me as I walked around the corner of the garage he turned around just before I got to the back edge of the pool. I heard him gasp.

“Oh migod…look at him!”

I was wearing his clothes, Don had picked out Grey Linen slacks, a matching grey Cashmere turtleneck pullover with a Navy blazer and cordovan slippers and belt. I loved the way these clothes made me feel inside. I felt like I owned the world, like I could do anything.

When I reached the deck Drew was sitting there in stunned silence, mouth agape and his face had paled.

“So, guys does this look okay?”

Drew stayed silent.

Don laughed heartily.

“I can’t believe it. He’s speechless Jack. And yes, you look way beyond oaky. You look like a model from those magazines we checked out last night except you are better looking than any of those guys.

Drew still hadn’t said a word. I did a turn, one hand in a trouser pocket like a model, I stopped facing drew put a foot on the bottom step, leaned forward a bit and looked at Drew.

“Drew! Hello in there! Drew! Drew!”

Finally he snapped back to the present. His face was crimson now.

“Sorry, I’ve never seen you in anything but jeans. If I couldn’t see your eyes, I wouldn’t be sure this is my Jack. Jeez man, who knew you were such a handsome man? You may have to fight off the ladies tonight. Please excuse me, I need to go pee.”

Don looked a bit surprised and wondered aloud if Drew was okay. I have to admit Jack, if I were a gay man, I would have had the same reaction as Drew did when you walked too us. You look stunning and you are sexy as hell, man.

I know I looked puzzled, did Don mean that Drew was gay? When Drew returned he was his old self again,he walked to me and put a hand on each shoulder, looking me over.

“Damn…these things never looked that good on me, Good job Don.”

“Wait, it was Jack that picked the look out. He went through those magazines in your room and pointed this out. I was fairly sure we could find it in that Men’s store you call a closet.. But you’re right about one thing Drew.”

“What’s that Don.”

“Those things never looked that good on you!”

Drew picked up a pillow from a chair and threw it at Don.

“Thanks bro, just what my fragile ego needs, you taking me down a peg or two.”

“Oh migod…YOU!…Fragile Ego! That’s a laugh. You have more ego and vanity that any man I know Drew.”

“That calls for a round of drinks! Jack come carry the tray out while I mix up a Sangria. We have a car coming to pick us up for dinner. No drinking and driving for us.”

Inside as he poured the wine into the pitcher he looked to me.

“You absolutely stunned me when you walked up looking like that Jack. You’re truly beautiful.”

I went over and hugged him.

“Whatever I am or who ever I will be, is all because of you. Thank you Drew.”

I kissed his neck, just above his jacket collar and below his ear. Immediately his hand went to the spot I kissed, and he just looked at me, no words, just a look that made me shiver inside. I know he cares for me. But could it be possible that he could love me like I want to love him? That’s what I wanted his look to mean but I couldn’t be sure. But now, maybe I could let myself hope that we could be together someday.

Just as we were finishing the first drink we heard the car pull into the drive. Don and I went down the drive while Drew went through and locked up the house and met us at the car. Drew gave directions and pushed the switch to close the glass between us and the driver and poured us a bit of wine from the Limo bar.

Don was the first to speak.

“Jack, Drew, you know I have to leave tomorrow afternoon I have to get back to the grind and to the ball and chain. Christina is a great woman, but there are times I just want to smack her into next week. I just grin and bear it. Anyway, back to the item at hand. Thank you both for making my visit so much fun and a great break from the rut I was in. I expect great reports on your school progress Jack; and I’m glad you are here to watch out for poor Drew. I’m hoping one day soon he’ll come out of that shell and claim the prize he wants so badly. You guys are great fun to be with and I love you for putting up with this crabby old Lawyer.”

He lifted his glass.

“To good times and great people.”

We chatted a bit more, Don was adept and getting everyone into the conversation. Maybe I had gained confidence knowing that for the first time in my life I was well dressed and looked good in these clothes. I talked more this night that any I can ever remember. Even Drew noticed it. I felt our legs touching together again. Whether we went to the salad bar or th the restroom when we were back in our seats, our legs were touching. I loved it and it gave me more hope that he would come around someday. I knew I had to be more than a Day Laborer to attract Drew Duncan. I would get my degree from that college and I would do my best to get the man sitting beside me.

With me so inexperienced in eating out I opted for Flounder Almondine, the fish would be easy on my stomach and not bulge my waistline. Don had a Fillet and Lobster Tail and Drew just had the Lobster. After our dinner I had my first glass of Champagne and wasn’t impressed. I did find a liking for Martinis and wound up more than a little tipsy. Drew called for the Town car and soon we were on our way home. Once back at Drew’s we headed straight for the deck and sat there waiting for the coffee to finish. Drew had started it when we came through to the deck. Don and Dew began talking about some business deals and I sat there listening quietly.

As they talked on I began to get sad and feel inadequate again. No doubt that the liquor was having it’s effect. I lapsed into the familiar ‘poor pitiful me’ mood and was down on myself because I couldn’t follow their conversation, I had no clue what they were talking about. It made me think that all my hopes and dreams for a future with Drew were just that. Dreams. I decided that I needed to go to bed so I got up and started for the garage. I heard drew calling my name but I just kept walking. He got to me as I reached the stairs.

“Jack…you okay bud?”

“No, I’m gonna be sick Drew. I got to get up to my bathroom, now.”

Drew followed me and against all my protests stayed there with me as I threw up an expensive meal and lots of Gin. I remember him holding my head with a cool damp cloth in his hand. I don’t remember him taking me to my bed or undressing me. I do remember the next morning’s headache. Vividly!.

Drew knocked lightly on my door and I groaned a half hearted ‘come in” as I struggled to sit up on the side of the bed. Drew had a carafe of hot, black coffee in one hand and a mug in the other. He poured a cup and handed it to me.

“Bad headache, huh?”

“the worst, at least for me. I’m so sorry I was a drunk. I feel humiliated and embarrassed. Please forgive me. There will never be a repeat of that performance I promise you. Thank you for staying and getting me tucked in and tell Don I’m sorry.”

“You tell him yourself when you come down for brunch after a cold shower. Up and at it Jack.”

I did manage to get into a cool shower and immediately felt better. When I was getting out I wrapped a towel around my hips and went to get the coffee and mug. I dried my hair with a dryer Drew loaned me, pulled on clean jeans (going commando), a tee shirt and the leather flip flops that Drew gave me. I ran my fingers through my hair and went down to the deck.

Don was carrying a tray with plates and cutlery to the table and I went in, grabbed the coffee and cups and was headed out the door when Drew gave out a wolf whistle. I laughed and shook my butt at him and went out to help Don setup.

He looked and me and gave a little chuckle,

“You’re a sadistic fucker aren’t you.

“What! why on earth would you think that Don?”

“Just look at you! Those jeans look sprayed on, I’m betting you’re going commando under them too, You’re muscled and ripped torso shows through that tee shirt and with everything else you have going for you even your damn feet are sexy. I’m straight and I see all this, just think how crazy you’re gonna drive a gay man.”

“Lucky that there aren’t any gay men around then; er Don, do you think I should got change into something else.”

“Jeez, you really don’t know, do you. Nah, the damage is done now. Someday I’ll tell you why I’m telling you this. I promise.”

On my way back to the deck I heard Drew asking Don why he was giving me a hard time about the jeans and tee

“I was just protecting my little bro, you’re already crazy about him, and the way those jeans fit him is illegal in some cities. The crazy part is the kid doesn’t have a clue that you’re so mad for him, and has no idea of the way he looks in his ‘work clothes.”

I knew right then that Drew must be gay. My heart raced and I felt light headed at the thought that we could get together someday.

Then I realized that it wasn’t very likely that Drew would ever settle for someone like me. He’ll have a handsome successful partner, Not an orphan from the county’s Juvie Hall. I stepped up onto the deck and took a seat. I sipped at the coffee in silence. No one talked and the silence became awkward. Finally Don spoke, mentioning he would get on his way home after One O’clock. He and Drew got into talking about family, I excused myself to the bathroom just to get away. I sat on the edge of the tub with my head in my hands thinking about what I needed to do tomorrow about school. I lost track of time and I jumped when I heard the knock at the door.

“Jack, are you okay.’

I stood and flushed, like I had been using the toilet and opened the door pushing my tee shirt into my jeans.

“Sorry, I was thinking about school and lost track of the time.”

“Jack, I’m sorry Don razzed you about your clothes. that was rude of him. Besides, I think you look great. The new hair cut and that stubble beard are a hot look.”

I was blushing, I could feel it, Drew rubbed my head and messed up the hair cut.

“Come and eat, we’ll be getting back to our routine later this afternoon. We haven’t had a chance to talk about my trip or what you did while I was away. We need some time alone to catch up”

“That will be nice, I really did miss you while you were away Drew. That’s a first for me too. I never had anyone to miss before you.”

We walked back out onto the deck and Don put down the paper he was reading.

“Everything okay guys?”

“Yeah, I was just thinking about school and lost track of time. These eggs look good, what’s the yellow sauce?”

“They’re called Eggs Benedict, the sauce is called Hollandaise, it’s made from egg yolks, butter and lemon juice and a dash of sugar. I hope you like them.”

Taking my first bite my eyes got big. This was delicious. I wiped my mouth and told Drew that Eggs benedict could become my favorite meal.

“Then I’ll have to show you how to prepare them.” Drew replied.

I turned to Don.

“So Donnie, when is the big wedding day?”

“It’s set for New Years Eve, if we make it till then.”

“What’s that supposed to mean?” Drew asked.

“Just me wondering if I’m sure about this. That’s all. The thought of being tied to one person for the rest of our days is a bit scary, for me at least.”

“To me that would be my dream come true, one person to love and spend my life with. It’s been my dream for years” I replied.

Drew was staring at me intently, I felt myself blushing, then Don spoke.

“I really do wish I could feel that way about Christina, Jack.”

Drew remained quiet and I noticed that our legs were no longer touching. Did I go too far saying I dreamed of just one person to be with forever?

We finished our meal and Don and I did the clean up, Drew had gone to his room and Don and I went back onto the deck.

“Jack, I don’t mean to pry or to embarrass you in any way but before I leave there is something I need to know about you. I know how you and Drew met and became friends. Now comes the hard part. Jack I need to you promise me that you will never let Drew know what I am about to tell you. Do you promise me that you will not tell him. I can assure you that your not telling him what I tell you will not harm him or cause him any sort of trouble. But it is important that you know this about my brother.”

“Yes, I do promise that Don.”

Don took a deep breath and let it out as a long sigh.

“Jack, Drew is gay. What’s more, he is crazy mad for you.”

My hand flew to my mouth to trap the cry that escaped from my throat.

“Jack? are you okay?”

I just nodded yes, I couldn’t even speak yet. I was visibly trembling all over and Don looked worried.

I choked out “me too, crazy for him. Gay too,”

Don relaxed and put a hand on my shoulder.

“I was right! I thought that there was a good chance that you would feel the same way about Drew. Remember you can’t tell him what I just told you. I’m confident after what you’ve said that all will work out in it’s time. You’re good for him Jack and I’m glad it is you he’s found. Here, this is my business card with phone numbers. Call me if there is ever anything I can do or if you just want to talk.”

Don whispered, Drew’s coming out now, Try to be normal.

That made me laugh out loud.

“What’s so funny out here, guys?”

“Don’s telling nasty jokes”

Don got up chuckling, winked at me and said he had to pack and get ready to go.

Drew and I sat not saying much of anything, finally he said that after Don left we should sit down and have a good talk. I nodded and agreed with him.

We walked Don to his car and I hugged him goodbye until we see him at the wedding. I whispered my thanks for his help and that I would keep the secret. Drew and I stood, waving as he drove off. We turned and went back into the house. In the kitchen Drew poured himself a strong drink, I said no, I might never drink alcohol again after last night. I turned on the juicer and put in a couple of apples and had a wonderful drink.

We talked about school tomorrow and when I’d be home. He told me to come and talk with him as soon as I got in. He told me about his business trip and the tourist things he had done, He was near the beach so he spent a Sunday there .

Before we realized it was dark out and he got leftovers from the fridge and we noshed on them and watched “Masterpiece Theatre” on PBS. Drew drifted off to sleep and I covered him with a throw, turned off the TV and went to my place. In my bed my mind was full of things that Drew and I would be doing as a couple, I had sweet dreams of us all night.

After work I headed straight for the Community College and to my first class. The classroom was nearly full as we waited for the instructor to appear. He came in from a side door and I felt like I was punched hard in the gut. The instructor was Ed Browning, my Foster Parent at the last home I was in. The memory of him attacking me flooded back, he had forced me down and was having his way with me when I hit him beside his ear with a piece of firewood. I knocked him unconscious and I wound up in Juvenile Hall. I was 16 at the time.

I couldn’t believe that he was the instructor for my class. I started gathering my things to leave and stood just as he yelled out.

“John Tinker, what a surprise, I thought you would be in prison by now. He proceeded to tell the class that I was put into his home for Foster Care and I was the most ungrateful wretch he had ever known.”

“I screamed back at him. Ungrateful! Yes, I detested you when you pulled my clothes down and attacked me. I detested you when you got on your knees and sucked my flesh raw. I detested you when you beat me with a leather belt. What’s more, I detest you now.”

I took my things and started our of the room.

“Come back and sit down John Tinker, I’m not through with you!”

I turned and shouted back at him

“Yes you are through. I’ll see to it that you will never molest another child. It’s me, Ed Browning that isn’t through with the likes of you.”

Browning was as red as a beet, and completely shocked when the students all closed their books and followed me from the classroom. I ran to the bus stop and paced back and forth. I was a wreck as I waited for the bus. I hurried on the first one to stop, not even noticing where it was going.

I got off at the WalMart I knew and walked home from there. I walked up the drive, past the pool and was at the garage when Drew called out.

“Jack, you’re early is everything alright”

I didn’t answer and ran up the steps to my place. Soon Jack was at the door calling for me, he found me huddled in the shower trembling and crying. He panicked, thinking had been mugged or hurt.

He finally got me out of the shower stall and onto my bed, we sat there side by side as he checked to be sure I wasn’t injured. Then he just sat there, his arm around me as I trembled and cried. When I had calmed down he turned my head by my chin to face him.

“What happened, Jack. I can’t help until I know what made you this way.”

“I know, but I’ll have to tell you all the story. Please don’t hate me Drew. That would break me.”

“I could never hate you Jack.”

“Drew, My parents were killed in an auto accident when I was seven years old. My only other living relative was my Aunt who had four children of her own, her husband had left her and she couldn’t take me in. I wound up in the County’s Foster Care program. By the time I was ten I had been in seven different foster homes. A couple of them were really nice, with foster parents that were kind and really cared about me but in both cases their jobs took them to another state and I was shuffled along to the next Foster Home.

By age thirteen I had been abused in just about all ways possible, the husbands and the wives would use me to satisfy their sadistic fetishes and lust. By age 14 I had grown big enough to fight off my attackers but this behavior only got me sent to juvenile detention where one’s personal safety came at a price exacted by the guards. I quickly learned that refusing the guards was the fast track to solitary confinement and beatings at the whim of the guards. I learned to provide them with what they wanted, and I was very good at it too, the guards kept me from harm and even favored me in some things.

I was released as an adult at when I turned 18. Alone, no home nor anyone to go to. I had $5.00 in cash given to me to ‘live on’ while I searched for a job. At first I would stand at intersections to beg for work, money, or food. This caught the attention of the police who thought I was a Hustler. Young guys like me didn’t do as well begging as the older guys, I knew that I could easily make my living by stealing and robbing but I wanted desperately to be a man of substance. I knew that I had to keep myself off of drugs and steer clear of those who would involve me in the easy, illegal side of life. That’s when my Guardian Angel came into my life. You picked me out from the day laborer pool and changed my life.

Tonight I went to my first class, so excited but when the door opened and the instructor came in. I was stricken, the instructor was Ed Browning. His was the last Foster care home I was in. I was sixteen when he attacked me. I managed to catch him off guard as he was having his way with me and hit him in the head with a piece of firewood. I beat the dickens out of him and wound up in Juvenile Hall. I guess he had seen my name on the class list. The first words he said in class were,”

“John Tinker! I thought you’d be in prison by now.”

“He told the class I was the most ungrateful wretch he had ever known. I lost it then, I stood and screamed back at him that yes I was ungrateful when he attacked me, I was ungrateful when he got on his knees and sucked my flesh raw and ungrateful when he beat me with a leather belt.”

“Jack,oh my poor Jack, I had no idea. I knew you had known pain and sorrow but I never could have imagined how horribly you have been treated. Look at me Jack. Look. You never have to fear this man again. We’re calling Don in the morning, he’s a lawyer, he’ll know what we can do.”

“Drew, you don’t hate me? It’s such a sordid wretched life I’ve led. I don’t deserve anyone like you.”

“How could I hate the man I love? Or the man that loves me.”

My head snapped around to face him.

“What did you say?”

“I said I can’t hate the man I love, the man that I now know loves me too. It’s okay Jack, Don called and told me what he made you promise not to tell me. He felt so bad about putting that on you. He called to tell me when he got home last night. He said it had bothered him the whole trip home. He also told me your reaction when he told you I was gay. He also told me to get on my knees and beg you to accept me. He thinks you the greatest guy ever Jack, and so do I”

I hugged Drew to me,

“This is real isn’t it, I’m not dreaming this time. You really want me Drew?”

“Yes Jack, I want you, and I want you like you said at the table yesterday, I want to be your one guy, forever. I love you John Tinker. “

The waterworks started up again. This time they were tears of absolute joy. Drew lay us down on the little bed and he spooned up to me, both of us fully dressed. He hugged me close and kissed my neck.

“We’re gonna be alright Jack. Don will help us get this monster out of your life for good.”

I heard his words but they were like background noise, All I could here in my head over and over again was Drew saying,

‘I love you John Tinker.’

We both dozed off. Drew woke first and made coffee in my little kitchen, the aroma roused me from my bed. As I came in from my bedroom Drew met me and hugged me close, as we broke from the hug he kissed my closed lips, just a peck to let me know that last night really did happen.

Hey babe, I’ve been up a while, I called Don and he’s got a detective digging around. When I told him what you told me he was angrier than I have ever known him to be. He’s on a mission to nail Ed Browning’s ass to a prison wall.

Just then Drew’s cell started ringing and it was the Community College asking that I come in for an interview about what happened in class last night. Drew pushed a button that put the call on a speaker so I could hear the conversation too. The caller said that one of the students had made a video of the entire exchange between Mr. Browning and Mr. Tinker and had brought it to the Dean of Student’s office this morning. They assured me that Mr. Browning was on administrative leave as of thirty minutes ago and that he would not be allowed on Campus until this situation was resolved. The caller apologised for the unfortunate incident since Mr. Browning was a college employee.

Drew had me give them my attorney’s phone number (Don’s) and the caller was surprised.

“You have already retained an attorney Mr. Tinker.?”

“Yes I have. If you would, please relate this information to him when he calls. We mean no malice toward the College. Mr. Browning attacked me almost five years ago now. Mr. Duncan, my attorney will brief you as to our intent.”

After the call Drew smiled at me.

“Wow, they moved really fast. Don will get a copy of that video and suppress it so it doesn’t show up on the internet. I hope.”

Drew took the phone.

“I need to tell him about this call anyway , I’m calling him now.”

I told Drew I was getting in the shower and finished while he was still talking with Don. I put on my work clothes and was ready to go to the Day Laborer pick up point when Drew stopped me.

“You need to stay here Jack. Don will be calling several times today.”

“Jeez, Drew, what am I going to do, I’m no good at loafing around.”

Drew walked to me and kissed me, open mouth and tongues probing, I thought I would faint. Nothing I have ever experienced felt as good as Drew’s first kiss. When we broke apart Drew was smiling.

“There, does that give you any ideas about what you can do today Jack. Can you think of any better way to spend the day than with me in our bed in the main house?”

Not waiting for my reply, he kissed me again, this time one hand groped at my crotch turning things up several notches from urgent to frantic. We never made it to the main house. We stumbled into my room shedding clothes and fell on my little bed naked, bodies and lips glued together. Coming up for air we gasped in great breaths of air, our chests heaving and each with a disbelieving look on his face.

Looking at Drew hovering above me as I lay on my back I said.

“Jeez, drew, I never knew it could feel like this. You’re the first man I’ve ever wanted. Making love with you is gonna be my favorite thing to do. I know what passion is now, I want more.”

With that Drew leaned down and kissed me again, not so passionate as before but it had the same effect. My arms were around his neck and I raised my body to rub against him. Drew broke the kiss and moved his lips and tongue to my chin, around to my ear then down onto my neck, giving me goose flesh all over. He started his trek down my body, tonguing and biting at my nipple had me writhing all over the bed. I was limp from the excitement and feelings when he left the nipple and let his tongue and fingers play over the ripples of my abdomen. He lay his cheek against my lower abdomen below my navel and above my pubic bush,

September 2018
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